Now, I may be the last one to ask this considering this will be my second marriage but here are a few things I think I finally have figured out. First off, if there are any signs or red flags that he's abusive, run. Run far and fast girl. Lace up them sneakers and go. Abuse is no joke but that is a blog for another day.
So some things that I have figured out are, if he/she makes you laugh, then that is a really great start. You need to be able to laugh in all areas and aspects of your life. When you're just being lazy, having sex, serious situations to try to bring a fraction of levity, when your partner is sad. Laughter is huge. Next, is fidelity. That was a tough one that I learned the hard way and something I will never tolerate again. Ever. If you partner cheats, hit the road Jack and don't you come back no more.
There is absolutely no excuse for cheating. None, no "accidents" or mistakes. You meant to do that shit and it is NOT meant to be tolerated. EVER! Next, compatibility. You and your s.o need to click. Now, you may not get along on everything but who does? Aside from that, if you agreed on everything that's going to be one very monotonous and boring relationship. It's healthy for banter and light arguing. It's part of life and most human nature to be mildly combative.
Intimacy. Without it, the whole damn thing falls apart and that is a proven fact. Can we technically live without sex? Sure, but we are creatures of habit and we love our sex. Being intimate with our partners is crazy important. It's our nonverbal way of communicating how much we love and cherish them. There are all different ways of being intimate without sex too, kissing, hugs, snuggles, etc...
There is so much that is important when considering whether or not someone is really "the one" and sometimes we just know. This person just happens to posses all these qualities. Sometimes we get lucky and find the right one and sometimes we think we do. Other times, we are young, dumb and don't listen. I was the later in this equation. This time around though, I believe I'm getting it right. I love you Arrin <3
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